National coach Julian Nagelsmann continues to grapple with the suicide of his father, a tragic event that still resonates with him. The 36-year-old coach shared in an interview with Spiegel that he often reflects on the day he received the devastating news while attending a coaching course in Oberhaching near Munich. He was in the process of obtaining his C license when the course leader informed him that he needed to step outside. It was in that moment, Nagelsmann recalls, that he was confronted by his then father-in-law who broke the heartbreaking news that his father had taken his own life.
At the tender age of 20, Nagelsmann was forced to grapple with the loss of his father. He admits the circumstances were challenging as his father left no note and provided no explanation for his actions. However, based on the method chosen, Nagelsmann is convinced that his father’s decision was well-thought-out and final. Despite the grief and pain this caused the family, Nagelsmann finds some solace in knowing that his father’s act was not a cry for help but a firm decision, a decision he feels he must respect.
“He wasn’t allowed to talk about his job,” said Nagelsmann
Nagelsmann speaks fondly of his close relationship with his father, stating that it was an “excellent” one. His father was an employee of the Federal Intelligence Service, a job he was not permitted to discuss. Nagelsmann believes this restriction, coupled with the inability to share his worries, contributed significantly to his father’s emotional burden.
While Nagelsmann admits he is not fully aware of the specifics of his father’s role at the BND, he is certain that it was not administrative. His father was a courageous individual who often had to make tough decisions at work, fully aware that things could go wrong. Nagelsmann recognizes that he has inherited some of these traits from his father.
The period following his father’s death was a transformative one for Nagelsmann. Suddenly, in his early twenties, he was thrust into the role of family caretaker, dealing with insurance policies and other responsibilities not typically associated with his age. He had to make critical decisions, including those relating to his mother who found herself living alone in a large house filled with memories. These life-altering decisions, he admits, carry more weight than deciding which striker will start a game. This period of his life expedited his growth and maturity.
Süddeutsche Zeitung typically only reports on suicides in exceptional circumstances and after careful consideration. If you are struggling with suicidal thoughts, it is important to reach out to loved ones or seek professional help. Anonymous and complimentary telephone counseling is available at 0800/111 0 111 and 0800/111 0 222. Online advice can also be sought from www.telefonseelsorge.de. The German Society for Suicide Prevention provides a list of nationwide help centers at www.suizizidprophylaxe.de.
